1 hour, 39 minutes
Released: May 28, 2018
Recorded: May 19, 2018
In this episode of WEBurlesque The Podcast, Viktor lays down with Vonka, a burlesque performer, fetish model, pro-domme, and event hostess of Conduit Enterprises.
In her Red Room of Pain (also known as her bedroom), Vonka talks about her sexual awakening as a teenager when she learned that positive interactions with others always starts with asking politely and that lack of shame when it comes to your sexual interests can be a good thing. Internalized toxic beliefs about sex on the other hand, never are.
“The key is you go away. You give them space, you give them the information they need and you can be really blunt about it… but you then say I’ll be over there… and I found that the worst reaction I got was that they were flattered but not interested.”
From there, she explains her introduction to the kink scene and professional domme work, giving listeners an inside look into what “pro-domme party clowning” is really like and what it means to have something you love also be your occupation for better or worse.
“In some ways it’s really great because I meet a lot of people who are really lovely. I do have a lot of great experiences and I do love it, but after a whole night of it… I am worn the fuck out…and I do’t want to hit anybody. I just want to lay there and have someone go down on me or give me a massage and then leave me alone.”
Her and Viktor then go into discussions on several topics such as: Why people choose kink and how it is kind of like doing extreme sports; “Sometimes you want to put yourself through a physical ordeal to come out the other side and feel accomplished about it. I give the example of running marathons… there is a whole culture around it and when you do finally run that marathon everyone cheers you on… [even though] your body isn’t supposed to go through that… It is unhealthy to run to those extreme degrees and yet no one tells [those people] they are a sick freak.”
What the new FOSTA and SESTA laws are exactly and how they will affect not just sex workers but also the public at large through internet censorship and monitoring; “It makes Facebook or any individually hosted website responsible if anything related to sex trafficking happens on their website… which leads to monitoring our private messages as well as what we are publicly putting out on the internet.”
And what career fulfillment means in today’s world and how sex work is just as valid a job as any other; “I know escorts who choose to do what they are doing because they like it. They like managing their own hours, they like setting their own rate… and everyone is going to have good days and bad days even if you enjoy your job. There are always going to be days that are shittier or you weren’t feeling well so whatever you happen to be doing [for] work isn’t great… and that’s ok.”
Finally, Viktor and Vonka end the podcast by giving a rundown on why negotiation, after care, and following up can be crucial with new partners during both kink scenes and sex and how the best thing to do is to always have safety in mind and practice Risk Aware Consensual Kink while being as considerate a human being as you can be; “If I did something that person didn’t enjoy… I want to know…to make sure I never do that to that person ever again.”
- upon reflection of Vonka’s femme terminology, Viktor asserts Posh Spice is a high femme
- Intro and Outro Music: “On A 45” by This Way to the Egress – used with permission.
- Interlude Music: “Jazz Brunch” by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com); Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License; http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/
- Photo of Vonka by Atticus Media Productions
- everything else (c) White Elephant Burlesque Corp